Open Letter to Rue Morgue

Dear Sirs and Madams: Why do you never ask me to write reviews for you? Like, why the FUCK do you never? Are you under the impression I make a lot of money, so I don't need the work? (I don't, and I do.) Are you under the impression that just because I gave birth, I can't surf a deadline anymore? (Baby or not, depending on how long it's supposed to be, I can still write a review in half an hour and send it in a second.) Are you under the impression I can't make it to screenings? (Because I'm under the impression that most of your reviews are from DVDs anyways, so...whafuh. Just plain WHAFUH.)

I wouldn't be so annoyed about this if I didn't know so many of you, or if so many of you didn't know me. And I'm sure this is hardly the subtlest way to get this across, but--there ya go. I'm here, I can do it, I'd love to, please. Thank you.

And yeah, I'm feeling better now. Better enough to get peeved, at any rate.;)