My Theory, Which Is Mine
May. 20th, 2005 09:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
handful_ofdustOkay, anyway...I can't leave without telling you my neat-o theory of Padme's character-spine degeneration/how the incredibly bad love-scene dialogue actually works into "the plot". So here 'tis:
Throughout their relationship, Anakin--without even realizing it, probably (but maybe he does! Cr-EEEP-y!)--is using Jedi mind tricks on Padme. this explains why she, a seasoned politician several years older than him, suddenly think it's an unavoidable inevitability that she end up in bed with a sworn monastic warrior who's barely old enough to shave. it also explains how she throws birth-control to the wind, why she can't do much except go: "Oh, Ani! You're breaking my heart, (you kid-killing bastard!)" in the last sequence, etc.
I mean, really: What else could it be? He's not THAT hot.
Anakin: Oh Padme, I know we met when I was eight and I apologize for macking on you creepily even then, but...did I ever tell you how much I hate sand?
Padme: Really? Y'know, Ani, I think of you as my little brother and, uh--WOW, that's a crappy pick-up line. I've heard so much better, over the years. Why, I remember this one time at Senator Camp...wait. Um.(Pause) Brain...melllting...(Long pause; dumb brunette voice) Oh, hey. You're tall.
Anakin: (All amazed/smug, and shit) Yes. Yes, I am.
Throughout their relationship, Anakin--without even realizing it, probably (but maybe he does! Cr-EEEP-y!)--is using Jedi mind tricks on Padme. this explains why she, a seasoned politician several years older than him, suddenly think it's an unavoidable inevitability that she end up in bed with a sworn monastic warrior who's barely old enough to shave. it also explains how she throws birth-control to the wind, why she can't do much except go: "Oh, Ani! You're breaking my heart, (you kid-killing bastard!)" in the last sequence, etc.
I mean, really: What else could it be? He's not THAT hot.
Anakin: Oh Padme, I know we met when I was eight and I apologize for macking on you creepily even then, but...did I ever tell you how much I hate sand?
Padme: Really? Y'know, Ani, I think of you as my little brother and, uh--WOW, that's a crappy pick-up line. I've heard so much better, over the years. Why, I remember this one time at Senator Camp...wait. Um.(Pause) Brain...melllting...(Long pause; dumb brunette voice) Oh, hey. You're tall.
Anakin: (All amazed/smug, and shit) Yes. Yes, I am.
